Lines on the non-Discovery of the Higgs Boson

In search of fame I spread around
rumour that the Higgs was found;
But now it’s clear
it wasn’t true,
My career has just gone down the loo.


(by Peter Coles, aged 47½)


7 Responses to “Lines on the non-Discovery of the Higgs Boson”

  1. Bryn Jones Says:

    The LHC, to be quite crass,
    Was meant to find the origin of mass.
    But should it fail, the cost we’ll soon find
    To be an embarassment of an entirely new kind.

  2. Rhodri Evans Says:


    Can I submit your name for the Poet Laureate position?

  3. telescoper Says:

    I wasn’t aware that it was vacant…

  4. The LHC was badly delayed,
    Yet still the UK public paid,
    And now we may have have lost the race,
    To find the Higgs and save our face.

  5. Anton Garrett Says:

    Suddenly, nothing happened.

  6. stringph Says:

    A particle physicist named Dorigo
    Showed a remarkable lack of ego:
    He never claimed credit for a rumour
    Blaming it instead on his informants’ twisted sense of humour.

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