I Don’t Like Chocolate
I was beginning to think I’m the only person in the Universe who doesn’t like chocolate, so I’m grateful to this blogger for showing me I’m not alone!
Yesterday Cadbury were “promoting” their revolting “Creme Eggs” on Twitter. These are particularly vile: sickly sugar-soaked globules of a mixture of pus and mucus, encased in solidified baby poo. Eat one and puke.
I don’t like them, you see.
I often wonder what chocolate tastes like to other people, because so many are so over the moon about it. My boss has a bowl of chocolate on his desk for public consumption, and people are constantly stopping by. Even if we’re in the office having a meeting, they’ll open the door and duck and grab, with a “Sorry, just needed chocolate.” It’s worse in the afternoon, and particularly on Wednesdays. It usually derails my train of thought, because I have to wonder why these people who would otherwise never be rude, in this case intrude just because they need chocolate. I look at the bowl and feel nothing.
It’s a burden sometimes, to be an anomaly. What, not like chocolate? If I had a dime for every time someone asked me why not, I could quit my job and never look at that chocolate bowl again. I have grown to…
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