The England Cricket Team – Another Apology

I’m sure that I wasn’t the only person who reacted to England being bowled out for a paltry 67 in the first innings of the Third Ashes Test at Headingley by concluding that the England batsmen were hopelessly inept, that they would certainly lose the match, that the team had absolutely no chance of regaining the Ashes, and that Joe Root should be sacked as England captain.

But after their subsequent one-wicket victory in that match inspired by Ben Stokes, I thought I was wrong, and apologised unreservedly to Joe Root and the England team for having doubted their ability.

Now, after being comprehensively outplayed at Old Trafford, losing by 185 runs, and allowing Australia to retain the Ashes I realise that my previous apology was incorrect, that England’s cricketers are actually inept, and that Joe Root should indeed be sacked as England captain.

I hope this clarifies the situation.

Boris Johnson is 55.

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3 Responses to “The England Cricket Team – Another Apology”

  1. Anton Garrett Says:

    Yes he should be given the option to resign as captain or be sacked. He is a poor captain and it is making him into a poor bat too, although he used to make Test tons regularly. The precedent is how Botham was unleashed after the captaincy was taken from him in 1981. This time it is too late for the Ashes, but a reboot is always a good thing.

    Or will Australia be thrashed at the Oval with Smith getting a king pair?

    • It would be nice at least not to lose the series, but I think the weather might have something to say at the Oval…

      • Anton Garrett Says:

        The county championship restarts tomorrow, too. I have to be in London at one point this week and will be putting in an afternoon at Middlesex vs Durham. It will be nice to watch First Class cricket without caring who is winning. You don’t watch England for fun.

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